Messing with my mojo
by
on 07-07-2010 at 07:58 PM (383 Views)
SO, i'm sure it happens to most men once they reach a certain age, and while not all would be comfortable with discussing it in public I believe its important to get it out in the open. You know the score, everything goes well for ages, you perform well and the pleasure is there but after a while the magiic can fade and you start to avoid it, the fun is gone and you wonder whether you can ever be the same man again.
Yep I must admit I have the embarassing afliction......I've lost my paint-fu!
Its been a few weeks now since I last painted - the last attempt being a botched attempt that was scrapped, this perhaps tipped mee over the edge. The mini previously was probably my finest ever work, maybe the pressure or eaching those heady heights again subconsciously put me off? For someone that paints on 6 out of 7 days a week usually its a marked downtunn. Comissions are waiting, Golden Demon grows ever closure and a new ladder challenge awaits yet I just dont have the steam. I'll be honest my depression is pretty bad right now and the physical (if not the mental) symptons the worst I have endured but I dont think thats the problem, at least not the whole problem.
So what to do? Do I just force myself to paint something? Maybe a sacrificial piece or some sculpt I really love but have been putting off? What if it goes wrong? Will that send me further down the spiral of mini-painting doom? Its a risky strategy but so is sitting and waiting.
Luckily theres a painters get together in a few days and I'm hoping that will prove inspirational (as well no doubt as frustrating seeing all those gorgeous examples of someone with a brush some paint and a small piece of metal can achieve, it does pang on the heart knowing I will never achieve that!) But generally its an inspiration and I usually return from these trips with painting amibition sky high.
Heres hoping that happens!!









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